Thank God She's Gone

I am celebrating the holidays this year with extra joy in my heart. For thirteen unlucky years I've been working with Mrs. Borderline Personality, and for thirteen years she has been making life at school slightly uncomfortable on a regular basis.
A big part of everyone's job description in the department was to tiptoe around and not set her off.Complimenting her outrageous clothes, bolstering her flimsy self-esteem and not acknowledging her constant stream of lies was a part of every team meeting and departmental staffing.
She finally got 'picked on' so much with her multiple preps and service hours that she just "showed them" and retired at the semester instead of waiting until May. Hallelujah, choruses of angels are singing!! Free at last, free at last. Thank God Almighty we are free at last.
I really can't remember the school without her, so it's going to be a real shock to get used to some peace.
There was always something. If she had prom duty,she wanted graduation. If we had to go to central for inservice, she wanted to stay on campus. If she had morning classes that was when she really needed to have planning time. If she had afternoon classes that was when she really needed to have planning time.
In keeping with her theme of all these years, she had to be coaxed to her retirement reception because she had her feathers ruffled over the lunch arrangements. Then she stood in the doorway like a recalcitrant two year old while people tried to say nice things about her. The next day at the faculty luncheon she sat at a table of teachers from our department and said that a piece of Gorham crystal was not a retirement gift. She wanted to know where she could take it back, it's not going in her house. Can you even believe the lack of manners?
I know that she grew up in modest circumstances in the North and people in different parts of the country have different behavioral expectations about these things, but I'm pretty damn sure my Mother would have had my hide from grammar school on if I'd ever said anything so thoughtless of people's feelings.
It is a time of goodwill toward men, so I'm going to stop denigrating this poor soul and just be glad that come January, back to work in 2009 is going to be a happier new year!

The Importance of Obama's Election

Martin Luther King, Jr. went to the mountain top and looked over into the Promised Land. Last Tuesday, Barack Obama was elected to be our Joshua. Someone to restore hope in the democratic ideals of America and lead us into uncharted territory.
The historical nature of the election reveals a number of things about the state of our being as a society. First, Obama is truly a man of the people. Half black, half immigrant...he was raised on the fundamental American value that you can be anything if you work hard enough. Barack Obama takes away everyone's excuse to fail.
Cynics had come to believe that only the richest Americans, or those who had their support, could seek, much less win the highest office. Obama showed us how to use technology to start a grassroots movement that could raise more money than any major party fundraising machine ever imagined.
Naysayers and cynics are the losers in this election. The people have shown us that democracy does work. We have seen the failure of fear and division. Perhaps now we can see government used to solve America's problems. The major parties will have to give up campaigning on the issues and begin implementing the solutions if they want to win re-election.
We seem to understand now that people of the world are more alike than the small differences that appear to divide us. The survival of the planet is as important to Europe, Asia and Africa as it is to us.
Hopefully,we are about to learn that we are not what we buy. "Go shopping" isn't the answer to our economic problems. We are going to be asked to serve and to sacrifice and Americans are going to be good at both.
We let the lights go out in the shining city on the hill for eight years. Tuesday night in Grant Park there were no fireworks, but the lights came back on in the eyes of the people in the park and were bright enough to be seen around the world.
Barack Obama already has the means in place to communicate directly with the American people at Change.gov. We don't have to have our information filtered through the bias of a cable news outlet. He will open the doors and welcome Americans into the Oval Office and the decision making process. Obama won't be the decider, he will be the implementer.
The United States can only have one president at a time, and George W. Bush is the man until January 20. But Obama is running a transition that appears to be as well thought out and hardworking as his campaign. We have a chance America. We have been pulled back from the brink of self-destruction. I am so thankful and relieved to know that all appearances to the contrary, we are not sheep. We will not be deceived into an authoritarian state. We still believe in our country's core values and we still hope for the future.

A Few Good Things

The election is over...Barack Obama will become the 44th President of the United States on January 20, and that is a good thing. I have the feeling that I've missed some of the sense of goodwill and rejoicing that has gone on in other parts of the country. I am, after all, in Texas, and the underground website in my neighborhood was predicting rioting after the election was called for the African American.
I sincerely could not believe some of the things that came out of the mouths of students in my school,people that I work with and friends of long-standing. What are these people so afraid of? And how can they not see the intelligence and capability of this young man?
I was only ten when JFK was elected, and this must be what all the people who got involved in politics and government felt at that time. It is a sense of destiny, of a movement that is bigger than one person, far more powerful than the man himself. This is what they are talking about when they say his election is transformational. I hope they're right, because a transformation would be a good thing for America right now.
Miss Munchkin the Halloween Bear was here last weekend. She is six months old now and cuter than ever. She didn't go trick or treating. In fact, her costume was on only long enough for a picture...it was far to warm for bears this Halloween.
We had a wonderful time because the kids didn't try to visit everyone . They came for a visit with us,and next time they'll come for a visit with the in-laws.
The weather turned really chilly last night. About time, it is November. So I finally got in the closet and got out the sleeveless stuff and made room for the sweaters. I'm glad that job is done...I used to be a very neat and organized person, and now I make these big messes that eventually have to be dealt with.
The second six weeks ended Friday. I don't have anything positive to say about this class. They are pretty much a lot of narcissistic whiners. They all want to make the highest possible grade, but they don't want to learn anything. They have no intellectual curiosity, and no tolerance for hearing anything they don't want to hear. No, for example. They aren't very likeable,and isn't that a sad thing for a teacher to think? So, the good part is that in only six weeks, they'll be going off to someone else's class for the second semester. Yay!
The time has changed, we fell back last weekend, and now I go to work in the light. All week I felt that I was late for work. Then at 4:30 it begins to feel very late. But it also feels cozy and like Thanksgiving is coming.
In preparation for the holidays, I've gotten up every morning this week and done Walk Away the Pounds before getting ready for work. Well, okay... I skipped Wednesday morning, but I had to watch the morning after the election reports on Morning Joe. I did one mile the first day and two miles every other day, and in honor of it being Saturday, today I did the three mile walk. Ain't that somethin'?
I just sat down here to RSVP an invitation and didn't intend to spend this much time, but when there are so many good things, you need to write them down.

Two Days

Only two more days and it's all over. The election is almost here. I've already voted. Everyone in my family has already voted. That's 9 votes that Barack can count on if the GOP doesn't file a lawsuit.
It has been exciting and I hope it means that our broken government can be fixed and the political process has been taken back from the Rove/Clinton divisive gridlock that has made everyone cynical about government in America. I know that it doesn't have to be that way. Tom DeLay and Newt Gingrich can crawl back under their rocks, the authoritarian shift may be stopped. The unitary executive may be disbanded.
We had a wonderful two days with the MP and her folks. We had baby's first Halloween, the November birthdays and the clash of the Horns and Red Raiders, which was the only low moment of the weekend. UT ran out of steam and let the Raiders stop their winning streak and topple their number one ranking.
We had a house full of company all weekend with the old school chums stopping in on Saturday to show off offspring and the family getting together Saturday night to celebrate all the November birthdays. It was fun cooking Mrs. Massey's chicken spaghetti for the birthday dinner. We learned that you don't want to use Betty Crocker's carrot cake recipe. It isn't carrot cake at all. It was okay because it was spice cake,which goes with Fall and everybody likes cream cheese frosting, but it sure isn't truth in labeling to call it carrot cake. After the rum cake fiasco and now the carrot cake flop, my reputation is getting tarnished. Maybe I can redeem myself at Thanksgiving...if all else fails, I did buy a cheesecake from the drill team fundraiser at school.
Speaking of which, I guess I'd better think of preparing to go back to work tomorrow. The past two days have been so busy and satisfying, I haven't had a thought for work.

How to be a Hermit

Recently my social life has consisted of not being at work or going out to dinner with one group or another of old hens that I've known forever. This is not working. There are never any men. One grows dull for the lack of men to talk to. And all this eating out is turning me into one hefty grandma. I thought that Walk Away the Pounds was helping me, but even Leslie can't overcome lasagna and fajita nachos with a couple of frozen 'ritas.
Being with most of the people I know right now is a test of holding my jaw clamped while they bemoan our fate if "That One" gets elected. They all know that socialism is lying in wait and their vast estates are going to be commandeered by the government to feed the raggedy-ass masses which they so deplore. I have no patience.
People that I have known and loved for years suddenly seem suspicious of me because deep down inside they sense that I don't agree with them and I'm going to vote for the black guy.
I do have a lunch group at school that is sympatico. A whole table full of old teachers who know what the rest of America is going through because we've been having a hard time making ends meet for our entire careers!
But this is the red state that gave the world W., so it stands to reason that I might feel like a voice in the wilderness. Most of my friends don't know who Christopher Buckley is, so they haven't gotten the idea that being a conservative doesn't mean that you have to follow the Rovians into the abyss.
So, I'm not getting out much. Retail therapy is down due to the financial crisis. I tipped the mariachis a $5 Friday night because I haven't had that much attention from men since August. No one has even written on my Facebook wall this week. It might be time to explore some other options for meeting interesting people.
There is a bright spot on the calendar at the end of the month. The Munchkin is coming for a Halloween visit. I haven't seen her except on Skype since Labor Day, so she has lots of new tricks to watch, and hopefully I can capture two months worth of hugs and kisses in only two days.

Depression 101

Yesterday my students had an assignment due, big project, test grade and all that.
When the first class started to roll in, the excuses rolled in with them. I knew in advance that many of them had waited nearly six weeks to begin working on the research. You can tell by the questions they ask where they are in the process.
The first "problem" I encountered was a student who had emailed me the assignment.I promise you that if I had asked him to email it, he would have gone to Kinko's and printed it out and put it in a five dollar binder. But, since I asked him to print out three pages, he just sent it electronically. The school district doesn't provide me with in class printing, so this makes an extra trip somewhere for me to print this out for grading...you get the picture. The kid screws with you and makes it more difficult than it needs to be.
Next is Miss Technology who has her assignment on a key chain. She just needs to pop it into my computer and print it out. THERE IS NO PRINTER IN THIS CLASSROOM!!!! These kids come from homes in a very upper middle class suburb. Some live in McMansions and have BMW's in the school parking lot. The least of them have a higher standard of living than 95% of the world's population, but they can't afford paper and ink for a damned printer.
In each class period all day long, I had around 5 or 6 out of 30 to 35 who just didn't do the assignment at all. Those are the ones who tell you they left it on the computer table at home. If they had done it, they'd have just said they forgot it. But the computer table ploy is supposed to make you believe that it must really be done, or it wouldn't be right there beside the old Dell.
It is the same every time you ask these kids to do any assignment more involved than filling in the blanks.
Speaking of which. I also gave a quiz yesterday. The material was very limited. One chapter, one worksheet. Correct answers provided by way of review the day before the quiz. Grades on quiz...either 100 or 50. It's so easy that if you are trying at all you get them all right, but the problem is so few are trying.
We can't dumb this down any further, and inflate the grades any more. And the scary part is these kids all think that they are challenged and prepared to go to college.
No Child Left Behind, my sweet Aunt Fanny!!
Speaking of Congress...I suggest that we vote out the entire House of Representatives and such members of the Senate as will stand for re-election in November. They seem to have lost track of the "for the people" aspect of our government. They've been working for Goldman Sachs and AIG for so long, they have had to take a brief recess to regroup and figure out how to respond to the loss of the American economy.Thank God for a Yom Kippur or they'd have had to work a full week.
W. came out in the yard to assure concerned Americans yesterday. It was no fireside chat. He just isn't able to pull off concerned, it isn't in his repertoire. You know what I'd like to hear him say? "Hey ya'll, I'm really sorry that I haven't paid attention. I know now that the President of the United States can't be on the bike trail while Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld and Wall Street Bankers call the shots. I see now that what they mean about the wrong war and about the Bill of Rights and about the Constitution, and about telling the truth." I never intended to collapse the whole world economy. I just wanted to help a few rich buddies insure that they got richer and that we set things up where we'd just get you used to being lied to by the government and be afraid of anyone that doesn't look like you."
Yeah, I'd like to hear him cop to some of the blame for the dogpile we're in.
And how about that John McCain. Yesterday, he actually got booed by his own supporters for denying their irrational claims about Obama. It made me feel a little better about Senator McCain that he is willing to stop short of total indecency and say the truth about his opponent, even if it means that he might lose the election. I don't think the Palin woman will stop no matter what catastrophe her lying hyperbole causes.
I read a blog by some older lady who was writing about Palin the other day. Significant-other in-law sent it to me, and it made me laugh outloud to read this 82 year old woman's rant against Palin. In my experience great grandmothers don't use those words!
So what's the upside? It's Saturday morning and most of the household chores are done. It's OU weekend and Texas has a team with at least an outside chance of coming away with a win. Monday there is no school, so I have three entire days to luxuriate in time away from the ne'er-do-well adolescents. And Obama is way up in the polls.

Winners and Losers

I am disheartened by the number of people I've heard or read saying that Sarah Palin "won" the vice-presidential debate. Governor Palin read prepared answers, staying on her message, even when it wasn't prudent to do so. She didn't call any Iranian leaders by the wrong name. She looked "radiant" and "perky" and "fun" compared to worn out old Joe Biden. My God, the American people are just as stupid as the Republican Party thinks we are.
I am not Joe Sixpack, whatever the hell that means. I am a public school teacher who has read the Constitution and knows what it says about the office of the vice-president. I also know how Dick Cheney has tried to alter what the Constitution says.
As far as I can tell from reading and listening to economists, our nation is in pretty dire straits. The world is a dangerous place right now and our military is spread way too thin. We are just beginning a long slow slide into a social order we won't recognize.
After eight years of anti-intellectual leadership, I believe that Americans better get their fill of celebrities from Entertainment Tonight. We need to set aside our need to be amused and recognize the need for intelligent leadership. With the outlook on our horizon,it's going to be critical for those in charge to be able to look at a great many variables and sort out the best possible solutions. Those who are worried about paying too much in taxes, need to confront the possibility of not having anything to tax. We are at the point of no return and I don't think we'd be smart to have a flight attendant come up and take over the cockpit.
There's no guarantee that Barack Obama and Joe Biden are going to be able to turn this mess around, but but Rush Limbaugh and Sean Hannity are doing their best to poison the possibility by keeping so called conservatives misinformed about the facts.
I teach in a very upper middle class neighborhood in a very red state, and I notice that the kids look at me askance when I try to examine both sides of an issue. They've been raised on the dinner table opinions of faithful followers of the unbiased, no spin FOX News network, and they are fully indoctrinated.
Yep, Sarah Palin won the debate, she winked and "goshdarned" her way into the hearts and minds of Americans, and kept John McCain's maverick status intact. We were ecstatic about her ability to read her script without losing her place, except for her little foray into vice-presidential power. We know she would never let Iran go nuke-you-lur. And a McCain - Palin administration will lower our taxes.
So come on all you hocky moms, put on your lipstick and grab your wolf gun. The environment is just in a bad cycle, and everyone can choose their own life partner as long as they don't want any civil rights. Those mavericks are not going to be looking back, they're looking at the future when they are going to remake American government so we are protected from the special interests they've been protecting for so long.
No losers here.

Unlearning Helplessness

The list of things making me feel out of control and out of resources just keeps getting longer. The school superintendent doesn't want anyone to give homework or tests next week because some people still don't have power. Good idea, why add stress to these kids lives, but next week is the end of a grading period and we have grading scales that are weighted, so if you've only given one test...it's going to count more than the rules allow. My district is famous for "doing the right thing for kids", but it doesn't much deal with the details.
Paul Newman has died. He was 83 and I knew he was ill, but somehow, I never imagined a world without him. How must poor Joanne Woodward feel?
The trucks came and got the piles of storm debris out of the yards yesterday. This is a good thing. They left a border of leafy, mulch along each block. The men across the street got theirs in order ASAP. This sends Gram to the window wringing her hands about how, and when ours will be cleaned up. So as soon as I got up and moving this morning I went out to sweep and rake. The sprinkler had already been on, so all this gradoo was wet, but that didn't deter your determined yard girl. No sir, I got behind that push broom and swept it into a nice big pile. I picked it all up and put it into a trash bag lined garbage can. Result...a bag of leaves so heavy I barely survived lifting it out of the can. Now it's sitting at the foot of the drive where it will have to remain until Wednesday when the trash man comes again. OMG these are the kinds of things that make Mother nuts with anxiety. I told her that I had done the unthinkable, she assured me that she should have told me not to go out there...as she knew that the mess was wet. These things turn me into a child, trying to get it right for her, and having her lack of faith in my capacity to do a single damn thing right totally re-inforced. Someday, before one of us dies, I hope that she will just look at me and say, thanks for trying. I know that 'good job' is out of the question, but if she could just acknowledge that my effort was noticed....
That darn Barack Obama should have put John McCain away last night in the first debate. He had the bull by the horns going in, I thought. But he let the old geezer off playing Mr. Nice, Steady, Competent, Smart Future President. McCain looked like the doddering incompetent he is, but Obama didn't level him. So now the pundits are calling it a draw.I did see one poll on CNN last night that gave a win to Obama by significant margins on all issues polled. I loved that.
Bailout or no bailout. I've tried reading what a number of different economists think,and it seems that a significant number don't support the idea. What I can't stand is the idea of another aspect of the government (treasury) coming under the authoritarian control of the unelected elite. Paulson's plan calls for no oversight, no judicial review, complete autonomy to act. He was the CEO of one of these renegade financial institutions before coming to Washington...how do we trust his judgement to get us out of what he had a pretty big hand at causing in the first place?
So here we sit on the brink of financial ruin, maybe. We have two huge unmown, yellowed spots on the lawn to remind us of Ike. It's only 40 or so days until the election and Sarah Palin still might be elected Vice President of the United States.
A short semester has been shortened by almost three weeks. I've made my knees hurt doing Walk Away the Pounds, but I still have to wear size 12 jeans.
But....my granddaughter is able to sit up and try out sweet potatoes for the first time with her brand new bottom front teeth. She's able to reach for things with her grasping little hands and squeal with delight when someone tickles her little fat belly. She's able to get anyone in a restaurant to give her attention with just a smile, but if that fails she can always blow 'em her mouth fart noise.
Girls don't have to be helpless.

After All...

We went back to work today. The semester was barely three weeks old when we debunked to hide from Ike the Gulf Storm. The faculty met and it was determined that about half still have no power. Some experienced only minor inconveniences and lost power for less than a day. Others had trees through the roof, every room damaged, carpets ruined, floors buckled and months of expensive repairs ahead.
I was totally unprepared to work today. We needed to get grades in by three o'clock because progress reports are going out Friday. The Principal wants every parent contacted if the grade is below 74. I understand her motivation, but it seems hard to call someone who may be on day 15 without power and tell him his kid is failing social studies. After all, this is kind of a stressful time for folks around here.
I couldn't focus on what I needed to do. I was in one of those Claritin kind of fogs or needed my blood sugar adjusted or something. It was as if my brain was not available to deal with the matters at hand.
We went to lunch at the local Mexican restaurant, where enchiladas seemed to be the comfort food of choice. I notice that everyone seems to be grateful for whatever dire straits they were blessed to avoid, but still we've been strained by displacement, darkness or demands on our resources. Ike was here briefly, but the evidence of his visit isn't going to go away anytime soon. The piles of debris are turning brown and breeding seething flocks of gargantuan mosquitoes.
Writing this I am able to understand why I feel tired. Everyone is tired. Coping is hard work and when the kids come back to school tomorrow we know that they won't really be prepared to focus on school.
The collapse of the economy seems more eminent with the proposed $700 billion bailout. Bush is addressing the nation tonight to tell us how urgent the bailout is.
He only comes out of his hole when he and his elitist appointees have brought everything to the edge of the abyss. The McCain campaign is suspending their political endeavours so that the Senator can return to Washington and help forestall economic chaos. After all, we cannot be playing partisan politics at a time of crisis. We can't stand and explain to the American people what we think or plan to do about such problems either.
I'm tired. After all, I've been through a hurricane, been out of work for almost two weeks, have had to watch my country slip into Third World Status. It's draining and demoralizing.
It's time to start looking for the upside...there's bound to be one. As Scarlett said, "Tomorrow is another day."

Powering Up

Ten days after Ike made landfall and tore hell out of southeast Texas, our power has been restored. CenterPoint Energy has made a lot of enemies in the last few days, but I'm not one. I've driven around enough to see what the linemen are up against, and I'm just glad we only had to wait ten days...it could have been much worse.
Here in the Planned Community, the big trees were snapped off, uprooted and thrown around like Ike's personal Lincoln Logs. We were among the fortunate ones who only had to clean up limbs and rake trash into piles. There were no windows broken, no holes in the roof, the house is intact.
I've finally seen television and the pictures from Gilchrist, Crystal Beach, and Galveston are of total devastation. It will take a long, long time for life to reach any semblance of normality along the coast.
The things you miss are so strange. Brewed coffee is such an ordinary thing, but if you have instant made with water boiled in the fireplace, you really appreciate Mr. Coffee and Folger's.
I didn't miss television except for the news....I'm a news junkie, and I have been in withdrawal for ten days. I missed the Internet. I even missed being able to go to work. When my cell phone battery finally died, I missed not having anyone's phone number. Remember when you could remember the phone number of everyone in your immediate world? Now I don't even know my kids' numbers. Everyone is on the contact list.
If you've never been through a hurricane, I can't begin to tell you what it does to your stress level. Other parts of the country have blizzards and tornadoes, earthquakes and volcanoes. I've never been involved in any of that action, but I'll bet you wouldn't want to trade disasters.
Hurricanes' destruction just seems to be so wide spread and take so many different forms. What isn't blown to hell is wet and covered in mud and mold.
But it's over and hopefully, it will be another twenty-five years before Galveston takes a direct hit. Maybe twenty-five years will be long enough for Galveston to get back on it's feet.

Waiting for Ike

A monstrously big hurricane is looming off the Texas Coast this morning. A gigantic swirling bully named Ike. He's expected to make landfall in the early morning hours Saturday, but long before that we will feel his hot breath on our necks.
Hurricanes are a part of living on the Gulf Coast. I have been through two. As a child there was Carla, the hurricane that made Dan Rather's career, and as a young mother we endured a week without electricity after Alicia. So we know a little bit about what is in store.
The build up to a hurricane is almost fun. You get to buy supplies and make plans and get prepared. Once the gas tank is full, the prescriptions are filled, the pantry is piled with canned goods (and you have a manual can opener), and there's a supply of bottled water, you are set.
Every TV weatherman in town is up around the clock telling you more than you ever wanted to know about the wind speed and barometric pressure.
But the time is going to come when the fun is over, and you know that this is not worth a day off of school. When you have to huddle in the hallway and listen to the windows rattle and the walls shake, it will stop being an adventure and start being real damn scary.
There has been a mandatory evacuation for the coastal and low-lying areas since 9:30 Thursday morning. It's now Friday morning, and the reporters are still seeing some people who say they are going to ride out the storm in Galveston. Mental illness has to be a part of the process for someone who thinks that it would be a good idea to remain in Galveston for the next twenty-four hours. I don't care what property you think you need to protect. If you don't understand that the looters won't be out in this weather, you don't have a grasp of the concept.
I just moved into my new classroom in the newly remodeled school where I teach. We've only been there for three weeks. I have never enjoyed a classroom as much. It is beautiful and shiny new from window blinds to dry erase boards. If Ike messes up my new classroom, I will be furious!
But, I have an idea that Ike is going to mess up a whole lot more than a schoolroom. This storm has killed nearly one hundred people as it moved across the Caribbean. We are in for an ordeal.
Right now we have power and the rain hasn't begun. We can still have hot coffee and blow dry our hair after a warm shower. I only hope that it's not a matter of weeks before we can enjoy those comforts again.
God bless Texas.

Give Me a Break

If I turn on the television and see John McCain peering out from behind the Pit Bull with lipstick once more, I'll puke. The American people are quite out of touch with reality. These people belong to the party that is driving the country to the brink of collapse, and the ignorant electorate are excited because this bimbo is promising to reform Washington. How can people swallow this line of bull? The Republicans continue to harangue on their theme of hate thy neighbor and fear the world. Tomorrow Obama's use of the idiom about putting lipstick on a pig, will be flying from the mastheads across the country as a sexist remark. It's okay for them to slime you, but don't dare throw anything back. Karl Rove has taught them how to play this game with a vengeance.
My kids won't read. I gave a quiz today and for the second time this semester (only 3 weeks) practically everyone failed. Not because it's hard or they are not smart. Just a simple matter of not reading. They don't have any capacity to remember information. "I studied", they whine. No you didn't. You don't have a clue how to study. But these quizzes aren't going away this semester. I'm tired of giving in and lowering my expectations. That's what education has drifted down to...the lowest common denominator. Too bad for America. We're losing our edge in so many ways, and the kids don't even believe it when you tell them. Wake up and do something to make the world better. Stop adoring yourselves for a minute and take an honest look at where we are, and how it's going to affect your future.
I just saw a group page on facebook that a former student posted. You know your from our hometown if... Way too many of the references had to do with drinking and drugs. These kids have no heroes, and they don't stand for anything in particular, but they are proud of their ability to drink and drive.
The good news is that they are firm believers in their families' political views. They are firmly indoctrinated in GOP conservatism. They are pro-life, pro death penalty, and all for lowering the drinking age to 18. They know their rights and freedoms. They cuss out any damn body they please, run a redlight if they need to, and since they have no idea what habeas corpus is....it doesn't matter to them if it gets suspended.
Tough day at the factory. The product seems flawed. Quality control is out to lunch, and the books are being doctored by an accountability firm called No Child Left Behind.

American Fall

September is here. The time when the light changes almost imperceptibly, but enough to make you aware of the passing of a season. The mornings have been cooler this week. The afternoons let you know that you're still in Texas, and the sweaters and coats in Vogue and Macy's won't be needed here for quite awhile.
The political parties' conventions are over and the campaigning begins in earnest. I notice that many people I know are wowed by Sarah Palin and the astute choice McCain has made to reform Washington by bringing in the female equivalent of his maverick self. It seems incongruous to me that the Republicans have been the party in power for the past eight years, and now they are going to reform themselves. What good did McCain do during the previous nearly thirty years that he has been in Washington? Other than make friends with Joe Lieberman.
I wish that these people who are buying into the right wing rhetoric were paying attention to how government has functioned under the Republicans. Loss of habeas corpus, politicizing the Justice Department, invading Iraq, and ruining the economy don't seem to be reasons to deny the Republicans another four years to those who are certain that Obama will join forces with Bin Ladin, make everyone a Muslim, do away with the Second Amendment and appoint raving Liberal justices to the Supreme Court in his first hundred days in office. My friends are afraid that Obama will take away their hard earned fortunes and redistribute their wealth to hordes of indigent welfare mothers who have done nothing to deserve a handout, nevermind a hand up.
Four short years ago, in the last election, I too was swayed by the fear of the Karl Rove political machine. If we weren't in Iraq, we'd be overrun by Muslim fanatics. Our corporatist economy was sound....liberals meant the Clintons.
What a difference. Now I see the world through different eyes. The right-wing Christian fundamentalists don't seem very Christlike at all. In fact, their lack of compassion is scary. The faces at the RNC seemed all remarkably alike. Mostly white, mostly male, uncomfortable some way. Not very like America with all its races and religions and variations on every theme.
I felt more comfortable watching the Democratic Party in Denver. That crowd at Invesco was emotionally invested in narrowing the gap between the haves and have nots. They were rich and poor and black and white. They were right and wrong, but they care about people and their country more than stockholders and the bottomline.
This fall will be a long season. We are all going to have to sift through a great deal to find our own kernel of truth in this political season. While the leaves turn, and college boys play football and students get back to their classes, America is going to have to make a choice. Are we going to save our country from a Party which has spent eight years making our government unrecognizable by its authoritarian shift. Or are we going to take back our government and try again to abide by the principles of limited and representative democracy.
I hope that this November we'll have something to be truly thankful for when we sit down for our American fall holiday.

Munchkin at Four Months

Spent Labor Day weekend in Dallas with the Munchkin and her folks. Greatgram hadn't seen the MP since June and that's just too long. She has grown, though she still seems small to me. She has the most delicate and expressive little hands and tiny feet.

She has the face of a doll and she is already aware of her capacity to charm. In restaurants she flirts with people at the surrounding tables. She blows loud noisy sounds with her dad. She reads quietly with her mom. She looks at every picture on every page. If things get off schedule or if she gets too tired...beware...she does have a very loud capacity for hurt feelings.

Leaving her is the hardest thing to do. Someone said that having a child is like walking around with your heart outside your body. I had forgotten that feeling as my own children grew up and became competent adults. Now I remember the feeling very well.

Yesterday morning she fell asleep in my arms and I put her in her crib to nap. My last sight of her was sleeping peacefully on her side. I wasn't there to see her awakening smile. But I know where my heart is.

The McCain Campaign

What the hell is John McCain thinking? How can the Republican Party spin the possibility that a 44 year old broadcast journalism major from Wasilla, Alaska is capable of becoming commander-in-chief? Two weeks ago they were all over pundit land railing that Obama was unqualified because he lacked experience. Now they have brought out the Governor of a state with fewer people than Austin, Texas to lead the free world.
She may be the ultimate right winger and have stood up to the corrupt good ol' boys in Anchorage, but I sure as the doubts don't want her for my president. It is terribly hard to understand the reasoning behind this choice. The world is a very complex and dangerous place. If we are so very nearly re-engaged in the "cold war", why would we want a hockey mom who has never had a passport to be eyeball to eyeball with Putin and Amahdenijad? This is insane.
If there was ever any doubt in my mind about my choice in the election....all doubt has been removed.
Speaking of the election. School has resumed, and we are studying the way government is supposed to work in this country. The kids are showing some interest in the conventions and campaigns. The school children of Texas are very much red state indoctrinated, so most will follow their Republican parents to the polls to vote against all those taxes Obama would put on the rich and well-born. I am quiet and when they ask for whom I would vote, there is short speech on my objectivity as a teacher. I do however, take the teachable moments to correct false and inaccurate information that they may have picked up via the Internet.
My goal as a teacher is to make sure that they are registered to vote if eligible and that they take their civic responsibility very seriously.

More of the Plot is Revealed....

I attended a family funeral today. The greatest generation is slipping away. My aunt was 85 and crippled with arthritis and a series of illnesses which robbed her of peace for many years. Her death is a mercy, but she will be missed by the sisters and daughters who loved her, and by the fringes of family that seldom saw her, but were comforted by memories of the times that we did spend with her growing up.
It was hotter than old billy hell in East Texas this afternoon and despite its name there is little shade in the cemetery where my maternal ancestors are waiting for the Resurrection. That's fitting weather for my cousins to come together. It was always the summer when we had the opportunity to be "up home". While my grandmother was out of school, she would keep any combination of cousins who came for at least a week at the time.
There were eight cousins. Four girls came first, followed by four boys. The youngest girl and the youngest boy have died. Neither of them lived to be fifty. But back in the summers of our childhood, we "canned" the peaches from our grandparents trees. We rode an old horse that my grandfather would saddle up for us to share. We slept four in a bed on the sleeping porch to be cooler. And after the peas were picked and shelled, my grandfather would sometimes drive you into town for a swim in the city pool.
We had history....Christmases, Easters, Thanksgivings. We had vacation Bible school and skirts alike that my grandma made on the Singer. But then my grandmother died and things began to change.
There were longer periods of time when we didn't see one another. There were graduations and college and weddings. There were divorces and moves. There were illnesses and deaths. Events brought us together, but not frequently. But always there was the history that made you feel a connection.
Today I learned another piece of the history. It seems that our family had a secret that very few shared. There was a baby quite a long time ago. She was adopted by another family and her young birth mother went away to college and eventually to a career in another state.
When the baby turned eighteen she found her birth mother and began a relationship, but the matter was not widely known. Now the baby is thirty-something with babies of her own.
Happily, today when the minister read the list of my aunt's survivors, he named a granddaughter and two great-grandchildren.
It was not so hot in the cemetery under the funeral home's portable awning that this information failed to register with the unknowing.
I don't know how many more times our family will be together. The occasions seem to fewer and further between and maybe all the secrets have been revealed.

Stop the Testing

A couple of weeks ago the newspapers published the district by district results of the TAKS test.
Today's Chronicle carried an article about a TAKS Revolt. Now that it's time to go back to work, my attention can turn back to the matter of what the TEST has done to education in this state.
Accountability was an idea that had appeal for the taxpayers who fund public education because they needed to have some way to be sure they were getting their money's worth. Standardized tests allow the state to prove that they are providing comparable education at every level of the socio-economic scale. It has become a tool of the real estate market to orient consumers to the "good school districts" based upon their TEA accountability rating and the TEST scores.
But, if anyone would care to listen to teachers, we can tell you the truth about what the emphasis on standardized testing has done to education in this state.
I teach seniors in high school. I teach government, but I can tell you that no one cares if your kid learns anything about government or civic responsibility because the subject is taught in twelfth grade after students have taken the exit test. The content of the course is not tested, so it is of no importance.
I happen to believe that the Constitution is an important document, and that if the Bush-Cheney administration hasn't completely abandoned it, we may return to the rule of law, at which time Americans may once again realize that in a democracy it is necessary to have an educated and informed electorate.
But the flaw is not just about the subject that I teach. The problem is that I am receiving students in my class who are on track to graduate from high school and they are functioning far below grade level. These kids can read, but they are word callers. They derive no meaning from what they read, because they haven't been taught to read for context and for connections. They have been taught to look for key words by scanning. This helps you narrow down your choices when you are guessing on the TAKS test.
The failure of the accountability system is now becoming apparent to the business community and to interests outside the realm of education because our kids are not prepared for college, and they are not prepared to enter the work force.
They don't know how to think! They aren't creative, they are not problem solvers. Their written and oral communications skills are abysmal due to formulaic writing requirements on the TEST and their reliance on electronic communications replete with its peculiar abbreviated forms.
Teachers have known for a very long time how detrimental the testing system is to education. But, no one values the opinions of teachers. How can you take the word of people who will work for such low pay?
Hopefully organizations such as Raise Your Hand Texas will be able to influence the legislature to make the changes that are necessary before it is too late. You only have to read a little history to know that ignorance is the condition of the enslaved, not of the free.

Failure of the Power of Now

I think this must be depression. I cannot focus on anything except how many things I need to get done and how few of them are going to get accomplished. I have so many distractions they are like ants crawling toward the sugar bowl of my mind.
I came home a day early from a weekend at the lake. Left the girls with the grandmother faces behind and came home feeling like an orphan who needed to come home from summer camp. I was having a great time, but woke up with some vague stomach complaint and never got feeling better all day. I took one of everything in the medicine cabinet and slept off and on all afternoon. Nothing cheered me up, not even a Skype with the Munchkin and her mama.
I know that the death Saturday of my Aunt is very likely a big part of these feelings. I haven't seen her in years, and she is certainly better off out of pain and suffering, but I have this bleak feeling that I need to attribute to something.
Maybe going back to work is not as welcome a change as I tried making myself believe. I had an electronic mailbox full of agendas and meetings and changes that are coming. Reading all of that seemed a little overwhelming and certainly lacked the comfort that I'm seeking.
I can't make a decision about anything...even simple things like whether to shampoo my hair today or wait until tomorrow. I am fretting about whether to rent a room at the reunion hotel or drive home late and be scared out of my mind.
I have a dozen ideas for projects that need to be set up or finished so that I don't forget them before I have to get back to work.
The world situation seems bleak .
I feel as if I've let down the team somehow.
Eckhart says that we can stop thinking. Get in the moment and ask yourself what is lacking at this moment. Attention. Here and Now. Wake up. I believe this is what I need to do...focus on now, get present and get over myself.

Summer Stuff

Went to an inservice today...that means school really is going to start and I really am going to have to go back to work. You know that being on vacation isn't going to last forever, but in this heat it is going to be hard to think about school.
Tropical Storm Edouard was a non-event. That is a good thing. We got much needed rain without any high wind damage or losing power. Caught a break on that one.
The high school reunion is only two weeks away now. I have finally decided to attend...I was dragging my feet, but decided my attitude was awful, and besides I have committed to The Year of Saying Yes, so now I can't say no. Now I have to get out and find something absolutely perfect to wear. Not too long, not too short or too tight, or too fussy. Can't show arm flab or too much neckline...really needs a collar and the right color so you look radiant and not washed out. OMG, this is why I didn't think I wanted to go....too much pressure for sure.
Then there's the presidential campaign. One of my friends from school has joined some No Obama organization. She's fighting "communism" for God's sake! I'm pretty sure she wouldn't post anything on my wall if she knew that I gave money to his campaign!! I don't know if he's the perfect answer to America's problems, but I'm pretty sure that McCain isn't. He is sounding more and more like the GOP's voice of fear. "Be very afraid America and vote Republican."
He's out of touch and I'm pretty sure that even if we "drill right here, right now" there's not going to be a dime's worth of difference in the price of gasoline at the pump any time soon.
Now they want to make this congressional vacation an issue. Hell, he hasn't been on the Senate floor for no telling how long, and Congress shouldn't take a vacation?!
The Olympics begin tomorrow and President Bush has gone for the opening ceremonies in Beijing. Should he be there? Who knows? Ron Suskind has published a new book that sets out the story of how Bush and Cheney falsified intelligence to get the war they wanted in Iraq. If this is true, it sounds like W might better just hightail it to Shanghai and stay there to avoid prosecution. Madame Speaker might not be able to ignore incontrovertible evidence.
Friday the Grandmas Gone Wild annual trip to the Vacation Spot gets going. I'm all set to roll after I get my roots touched up tomorrow at the Overpriced Salon and Day Spa.
Summer is a wonderful season...so much to do and think about.

I'm Hating This...

Okay, I'm overweight. Not obese, not freakish, just too plump for my own good. What we know about heart disease and cancer should be a good enough reason to drop 30 or 40 pounds, but I'm a former smoker...it takes a lot to scare me. I want to be able to bend over and paint my toenails without my abdomen being a barrier! I want to look like I'm not pregnant with a food baby!! Good health is for the conscientious. Good looks are for the conceited.
I've been "eating right" for 23 days. My food choices have been recorded, if not meticulously, then at least faithfully, in my always handy spiral notebook. I have had chicken, fish, and salad. I've had low-fat, no-fat, low carbs, no carbs. I've cut calories and I've walked in the heat and humidity of every Houston morning.
The scale has not moved. If you want to know what discouragement looks like, I can paint you a word picture. Discouragement is a fifty-eight year old woman with size 12 yoga pants who has to lie down to button her NOT YOUR DAUGHTER'S JEANS. Discouragement has to take a little pink pill every morning to keep down her blood pressure and has not been able to taste test Bluebell's summer flavor Candy Jar. Discouragement is mad at her mother for being a saboteur and not an encourager. Oh, Discouragement is ugly.
Right now, I need a miracle. Not Jenny Craig, not Nutrisystem, just a good old fashioned miracle.
So, I'm going to turn this whole thing over to a Higher Power. I can do this, I will do this.
Resolved: Eat Even Less. Move Even More.

Dog Days

It's not August yet, but if these aren't the dog days of summer...
I got home from Dallas yesterday evening and can tell from the drive south that the great state of Texas could use some rain. Everything from Hutchins to Centerville is brown. If someone throws a cigarette out a car window, there will be fire!
I spent five days with the MP and her mama while dad was in California on business. We had some serious girl time. The baby at three months is a real little character who has a winning smile and more expressions than a mime. I think she believes she can talk because she just carries on up a storm when you talk to her. She does this thing with her lips and tongue that makes it look as if she's trying to imitate what she sees your mouth doing as you speak. I know, only a grandmother would think such foolishness.
Even after five days of not thinking about it, the great class reunion debate is still simmering on the back burner of my brain. To go or not to go, THAT is the question. Truthfully, my bottom line is that I can't figure out how I could stand to go by myself (What if there's a lull in the action? Who would you talk to then?). At one time in my life, I would have been curious to see some of the people from school. Now...the desire just isn't there. I didn't like high school all that much. It was a hard time for me, so why would I want to relive it? I've sort of gotten over it by now. So why renew the subscription? So where's the conflict? The conflict is in the little part of my brain that says, "What's wrong with your anti-social ass that you don't want to get together after forty years with all those fun loving people who have gone to so much trouble to rent a ballroom and find 200 people who haven't even addressed a Christmas card, let alone spoken for more than half a lifetime?" Ticket $45, dress $250, fond memories priceless.....Uh, I don't think so.
It's less than a month now until I will return to work. Email from the department chair has picked up, a sure indicator that they are meeting to plot their strategy. No, I absolutely will not be there to help pass out textbooks. I don't care how much comp time you're offering.
The three best reasons to be a teacher? June, July and August. Really old joke with a solid kernel of truth. The summer has been long in the slow procession of days without much serious purpose, but has flown when I think of how soon it will be time to get up before daylight and be accountable to 150+ young persons, determined to try and resist your best efforts to get them to think that the Constitution is more interesting than the text message that's waiting on the personal messaging device in the backpack. There's so much relaxing yet to be done and I'm running low on free time.
Ah the Maytag is buzzing. Time to put in another load. Maybe I'll finish up in here and head out for a walk before the temperature "feels like" 104.

Munchkin's First Visit

The Shrink brought the MP for her visit to the hometown this weekend. First stop, Grandmom's house. They arrived around 1:30 in the afternoon yesterday, and Uncle J got here just as they did. He got big tears in his eyes when he saw her for the first time. What a moment. He seemed to think she was pretty fabulous.
We wore her out fast...can you imagine? We had the high school faculty, the neighbors, the friends...there were people in and out of here all day long. And the Wonder Dog thought they had all come to see her. The Munchkin Princess was pretty well behaved considering the size of her social obligation. She smiled and cooed and generally looked like a doll baby for quite awhile before she went into a rigor like we haven't seen since she got her shots.
Fortunately, she retreated to another part of the house with her mommy and got over it pretty shortly.
It is a blessing to have friends. Here are people with things to do who take time out of their day to come and oohh and aahh over a baby. They are gracious and kind and giving, and I appreciate them very much, each and every one.

Grandmom's for Obama

The pundits have been babbling for two days about Obama's flip-flop on campaign financing. He evidently promised to accept federal funding if the other guy did, and now he's backing out of that plan.
Whatever! This is not a problematic flip-flop for anybody but the Republican nominee as far as I'm concerned. I am as pleased as punch that Mr. Obama has decided to forego the broken funding process and take it to the people.
I went right to the post office this morning and donated fifty American dollars to Obama '08. The only political campaign contribution I had made up to this point was to Kinky Friedman for governor back in 2006. You can see I have a history of limited political involvement. Before Kinky's run for the governor's mansion, it was the early 80's and Bubba White was running for governor. Since his sister is my friend, I had to pitch in on that one. I even worked at a Democratic polling place in that election.
Then I went back to voting a straight ticket for the staunch right wing conservatives who have brought us to the present. But, flip or flop, I'm through with the Republican brand for the foreseeable future. They have stepped on the Bill of Rights, divided the American people, run public education off in the ditch, and pretty much thrown the economy into a free fall.
So this young man, who says simply that he recognizes that most Americans feel that the government no longer is of, by or for the people, has my attention.
I don't care if he lacks experience. Every U.S. President that I can think of has had to do some on the job training. Japanese bombers, Cuban missiles, the Tet Offensive, four dollar oil, you have to be able to think on your feet to qualify. Obama looks like he can. He's used the technology, he's played by the rules, he has the intention.
I'm a history teacher, and I say this looks like a history maker. America's first African American candidate looks like he could be the guy who can take back this country for the people. This is what is most important to me... fifty dollars from a public school teacher is appreciated. This is a campaign that says that what I think matters. This is a campaign that has made me believe that someone remembers the fundamentals of democracy and the importance of the rule of law.
This is going to freak them out in the oil company wives bridge group, but there's one old white woman in Texas who is getting behind the Senator from Illinois, and I can't think of much of anything that the GOP can smear him with that would get me to change my mind.

Yesterday in the Garden

After a trip on Thursday to the big box home store for the sale-priced power washer, I spent the entire day Friday cleaning the patio. I started before the neighbors were all out of bed and I washed inch by inch until the whole patio was shining in the late afternoon sun.
Exhausted, but thoroughly pleased with my perseverance in completing this daunting task, I just had to get brother dear to come over and unscrew the hose from the machine. When he put it on, he didn't know his own strength. By dark, everything was back in place. Chiminea, chairs, bromeliad to schefelera, all was in good order.
I crawled into bed to read around ten and was awakened a few minutes after midnight by my light sleeping mother. "There's someone on the patio," was how she woke me. Sure enough there was. She had been up long enough to determine that this person was terribly upset, crying and moaning. He had banged around in rage and was sitting in a chair crying. When I called out through the bolted door, he left immediately. This was in all likelihood one of the neighborhood underage drinkers from a party down the block, who was so drunk that he had no idea where he was.
Daylight revealed that he had wrenched open our back gate with such force that he bent the forged iron arm of the gate latch. He had turned over the patio table unpotting plants in the process, and had even left his shoe print on the back door when he kicked it.
The scariest part of this is not that he frightened two old women in the middle of the night. It's what might have happened if this kid had left his party and wandered into the yard of someone with a male head of household armed with deadly force to defend his property.
This is Texas after all, home of Joe Horn defender not just of his home, but the neighbors. I am a high school teacher, so I saw a kid who was drunk and stupid. But many in this area would have seen an intruder whose behavior was erratic enough to be interpreted as menacing. I have long been concerned with kids drinking and driving, but now I have a new fear for what might result when kids lose their way.

Birthday

I received the best birthday gift ever this morning. When GiGi went out to get her Chronicle, there was a package on the front porch. I tore into it expecting a copy of the four generation picture, but it was so much better than that. The Shrink published a book ostensibly written by the Munchkin Princess. The title.... All About Me. This is a hardcover with a jacket and the whole thing is just too priceless.
I was in tears when I pulled it from the packaging. I am awed by the thoughtfulness of the daughter who put this work of art together. Every picture is perfectly chosen and the words are funny and touching, just so right.
I was thinking about being old...not getting, but actually being. It's not so bad. I like the way I look, a little fluffy, but with character. I like the way I feel, most of the time. Better than when I was in my forties and hormonal as hell.
This is a good time to be getting older. The baby boomers are going to be a bunch of old farts to be reckoned with. La Maze sent a photo of our elementary school class the other day. We look like something from a history book in our little plaid school frocks. But I recognize those children. When I look at current pictures on the class reunion website, I don't recognize some of those faces.
All the survivors of the class of '68 are way beyond the generation gap now. We are the parents, the grandparents, the doctors, lawyers, teachers, financial analysts and real estate tycoons. For so many years, I kept thinking that I had to figure something out about who or what I was trying to become. It was a feeling that lasted a lot longer than I thought it was supposed to. But suddenly today, it occurs to me that I don't have to keep working on that question.
Today when I opened that box from UPS and pulled out the book with my picture on the cover holding a wide eyed infant wrapped in a hospital blanket, I realized I'm there. I am what I'm going to be when I grow up. I'm a daughter, a sister, an ex-wife, a mother, an aunt, a godmother, a grandmother, and a friend. I'm a teacher. I'm funny and smart and now I'm fifty-eight years old and still a child of God.

Father's Day

Father's Day is a little happier this year because it's the Johnson Boy's first. But, it's my tenth Father's Day without my Daddy. It's always a melancholy day for me. Mother would probably like it if I took a plant and went to the cemetery, but that's the hardest thing of all for me. What a harsh reminder of all that we have lost when you make a visit to a marble marker.
Me, I'd rather just think about how Daddy would have laughed that the girls were taking Gruncle to the Astros game, and he was wearing his Willie Nelson headgear. Or how much he would have loved the Munchkin Princess and been so proud of the Tacky Flapper for bringing her into our world. I think he would like Barack Obama, and I know he'd be glad Mrs. Clinton didn't make the cut. I think he'd be freaked out by four dollar gasoline. But, I think he'd be proud of us for taking good care of Mother and each other, and I think he'd want us to keep on having a good time and remembering him when we do.
So, no plant, no cemetery visit. Just a note to say how much I loved you and still do, and how much I appreciate everything you taught us about the right way to be in this life, and our faith in seeing you in the next. Happy Father's Day Daddy.

Tim Russert

Tim Russert died today. I didn't really know Tim Russert, but I feel as if I did. I cried when I learned of his death. Just as if a friend was suddenly and irrevocably lost.
Tim Russert was born the same year as me. Only about a month before me, in fact. He was from another part of the country and another faith, but our growing up coincided and the things that we believed about our country were based on similar values. The history that was made during our life time is incredible to consider: the Cold War, the Civil Rights Movement, Vietnam and assassinations, lunar landing, Woodstock, Watergate....We were there for some momentous events and the loss of innocence.
Tim Russert made a huge impression on me. He knew a great deal about things that I consider very important, and he was a journalist who came from a political background, but seemed to really get it that democracy exists in the light with citizens who are informed and constantly in search of the truth.
I am saddened for his family and for his colleagues. And I'm saddened because he was my generation, my peer, my fellow American and his death means that we are diminished by one whose voice sounded for what we all could be.
If it's Sunday, it's Meet the Press...without Tim Russert, it just won't be the same.

Hope

The esperanza is in full bloom today. The yellow bells are a sharp contrast to the green foliage along the back fence. All the color in the back looks like Cinco de Mayo! But it's the esperanza that catches the eye and lifts the spirits. Hope in English...these flowers blooming in the hot June sun at a time when we need some hope from any direction.
But there they are and there's Obama, another ray of hope. No money from lobbies and PAC's for the DNC. There's the Supreme Court ruling that habeas corpus is not GW's to deny, even to aliens at Gitmo. There's hope in that for certain. Hope that the conservatives will not be able to use fear to errode the Bill of Rights any further. Hope that Americans will not follow like sheep when they are told that they must trade liberties for security.
The esperanza is in full bloom today, and it makes me hopeful that we are turning a corner in America this summer. The economy may be bad, but the times may be about to get better when we are able to stop the divide between Americans and bring back something to believe in besides materialism and greed. It may be naive, but I remember what America felt like when JFK was the too young, too Catholic, too elite prospect for restoring hope in America. That was a good time...this almost feels like it could happen again.

THE Tomato

Today we ate the first tomato from my garden. Yes, there was only one. Actually, I've harvested three tomatoes, but you have to get them the very instant they begin to turn pink, or the cardinals will beat you to them. Two are ripening on the kitchen windowsill.
Every year as soon as there is one sunny day in February everyone races to the big box home store out on the highway for something to plant. My grandmother had a garden and she always grew tomatoes, and I'm determined that as a grandmom that's going to be part of my persona....Grandmom's garden. Now about those tomatoes. I planted them the end of February. I protected them from frost and high wind and lack of rainfall. I planted marigolds to keep the bugs away, and every afternoon after school, I faithfully showered them with very expensive city water. I was rewarded fairly early with blooms and that was encouragement enough for me.
I kept up my watering and fertilizing routine and staked the lanky things when the wind blew them down.
All my hard work has paid off and today we ate the world's most expensive tomato. In view of the great tomato salmonella scare of 'o8, we were very glad to have this ripe delicacy. We sliced it to eat with a pot of fresh purple hulled peas. It was small, but perfect. Thinly sliced and liberally treated with sea salt and freshly ground black pepper, it was an awesome acidic blast of flavor.
Next year I'm going to start with more plants and get some steer manure from the Ag barn to mix into the soil. Now that I know that I can grow tomatoes, the sky's the limit. I could probably do cucumbers and canteloups as well.

Summer Vacation

I'm a teacher. There's nothing I enjoy more than the first days of summer vacation. Ah...freedom! Freedom from school routine and office politics. All the glorious free time that looms before me. I always think that I'll do all these great and wonderful things with all this free time. Projects get identified and listed, and some even get started. Today's project turned out to be this blog. I never even considered the possibility before, but suddenly here I am and it's done.
Now I have this place to come to and set down my thoughts about whatever. What an accomplishment.
I have spent the last two days in Dallas visiting with the the Munchkin Princess. How I love that child!! Last night when changing clothes, I caught just the teeniest whiff of that wonderful milky, Johnson & Johnson baby fragrance and I missed her already. Today she is two months old and she is learning how to smile. She favored her GiGi with several, but Grandmom only got one. Considering the situation, I've decided that she recognizes who is closer to God.
While on this visit we saw Dr. for first innoculations against dreaded baby diseases. It was easier being the Grandmom in this. The Mom came out of the examining room in tears. But GiGi had read that a dose of sugar water administered either just before or after the injections had been found to reduce evidence of discomfort. I don't know if the greatgrandmother wisdom worked or if it was all in the baby Tylenol, but the little girl recovered quickly and slept soundly post trauma.
We took our four generation picture while on this visit. I have a feeling I'll be receiving a 5"x7" for my birthday next week.